He’ll want to postpone the election.

I re-worded that sentence because I’m not a constitutional scholar. I’m not a scholar at all. In fact, I have very few skills overall, but one of them is getting the gist of a situation quickly. Also Tetris.

I don’t wish disease upon him, or any ill will at all actually. This is largely because the next in line would result in real life Handmaid’s Tale, and the next next in line could easily be a President Alma Coin situation.

Once upon a time, pre-November 2016, I was criticized by a very woke white man for saying that I thought the President’s office played out a lot like the show Veep. That the show was entirely too ridiculous and that real life doesn’t work that way.

No, white man. Real life is the landscape a painter tries to capture on a canvas. Pop culture is the machine by which America tries to process its reality.

As our current President continues to hide under his desk with a bottle of hand sanitizer and precious brain cells to spare, he too is trying to anticipate the future. He thinks his is a valiant effort to save America, but his thoughts as a leader are clouded by his fear of death. On the one hand, he could get infected and fight it off and come out like a hero on the other side. On the other, he could die, leaving stupid Pence the job, and the Democrats a takeover come November. Oh, God, he should call the lawyer to revise his will. No, the best course of action is to stay in a bubble, stay healthy, do whatever the cabinet advises, and obviously postpone the election. The economy won’t bounce back fast enough to get re-elected in November. Bet ya Biden’ll kick the can faster than me. Man, I could really go for a Big Mac right now.